A Letter to Lee

"Gosh, I sure am bored," mutterred Kenny to himself. "The computer's been down all day, and I've forgotten how to do anything else. I guess I could write a letter to Lee or something."

Just then, Alice the Alligator strolled by. "You look like you have a case of the doldrums, Kenny" she observed.

"Who the hell are you?" demanded Kenny. "And what's with the stupid alligator get-up?"

"Now Kenny," Alice reprimanded. "Is that any way to talk in a children's story?"

"This isn't a children's story! It's a letter to my friend Lee."

"Oh?" said the famous alligator, bewildered. "I thought it was a children's story about you getting bored and writing a letter to pass the time."

"Untrue", corrected Kenny. "I often write letters disguised as other things."

"Well, I haven't the time to spend frolicking in personal letters," concluded Alice. "I must return to collect more smegma balls for the kids. Christmas is just around the corner!"

"Oh, shut up," offered Kenny. "I haven't believed in Alice the Alligator since I was four."

So Alice magically vanished, and Kenny began writing his letter to Lee. But he ended up writing a story instead, with the world-famous Alice the Alligator in it. Then he put it up on his Web site.

More Random Cruft from Ken